January 7, 2000

Finding the perfect book - THE COMMENTARY

By Joseph Planta

VANCOUVER - I must admit that I don’t really like to read. I find it both an annoying and boring experience, unless the book or paper has something that really interests me. But, with the creeps of age, I must admit I too, even skip some parts of a Rafe or Foth column or even a piece in EW. Even though I don’t read often, if I see a book that sorta interests me, like on a talk show or being reviewed in the paper, I’ll rush out to get it. Even if I’m somewhere where books are being sold, I might even buy it for no apparent reason. The reason? I hate going into a bookstore without carrying out something I’ve just bought. It reminds me of the old Burns & Allen gag, Gracie goes grocery shopping with a friend, but she’s already done her shopping and all she’s doing is accompanying her friend. Since she’s got nothing to buy, and feeling bad she left the store with nothing, she goes back and buys the wire basket.

Back to books. Books nowadays come in all shapes and sizes. Earlier this decade the big thing in were pop-up books and books that had pockets in them, chock full of other reading material like flashcards or fact boxes. Since it is the dawning of a new millennium, coffee table sized books have made their way to the local Chapters or Duthie’s. (Call me old fashioned.) They’re heavy, awfully attractive with flashy pictures and more and more visits by the author to radio and TV shows.

I like having books. They fill bookshelves awfully well, and sometimes they sorta represent some of your own personality. One thing I don’t like about books though, is that I can’t find a book I like reading. No, not he topic or the print, it’s the way the book is. The way it is. Hardcover books, have this pretty book jacket they are wrapped in, they have, of course, the tittle, the author, maybe a picture and, of course again, the stamp of the publisher. The peeve about the jacket is that when you open a book to read it, the jacket flops open and the spine part is thrust outward. If you’re not careful it gets torn or damaged, thus rendering you 32 dollar investment, rather ugly. So, I’m suppose to like paperback’s then right? Well, no. Paperbacks, and I’m talking about the novel size, won’t stay open. Say I’m sitting down and I’m reading, but I notice my shoe’s undone, and decide I want to do it up. But, I still want to read, so as not to miss a precious sentence or something, well then the book folds up promptly, and if I don’t have the page number memorised or a bookmark, I’m practically screwed. Paperbacks, and I’m now talking about the big kind, say, World Almanac, can stay open (rarely, I might add) if you bend the spine. Then again, you’ve rendered your 15 to 23 dollar investment ugly and now easily to be worn.

Encyclopedia’s are pretty good, they stay open and they have strong sturdy binding. But, how many people do you know have encyclopedia’s hanging around? When I started reading the Allan Fotheringham book (Last Page First) last fall, I had borrowed it from the library, so it had been laminated and pasted on so it wouldn’t fall off. This winter when I finally springed for my own copy, I encountered the horrors of the book jacket. It’s a nice jacket, nice colours and some neat caricatures, but alas it kept slipping off and tearing at the edges. To further prevent from damages to The Foth’s mug, I decide to do without the book jacket while I read the book. So sitting in some obscure place at the house is the book jacket. While I schlep all over, the living room, my room, my desk, the spare room, to read the Foth’s book. Bare and jacketless.

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An archive of Joseph Planta's previous columns can be found by clicking HERE .