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Psychically speaking - THE COMMENTARY

By Joseph Planta

VANCOUVER -- Anyone who has watched a significant amount of television in their youth has either held derision or intrigue towards psychics, clairvoyants and intuitives. Probably at the same time. Who hasn’t forgotten the endless streams of infomercials from fallen celebs like Dionne Warwick and her Psychic Friends Network. Or how about this so-called Jamaican tarot card reader, Madame Cleo. Anyone watching those infomercials late at night, into the early mornings, will most likely remember watching those tacky and tasteless commercials, and laughing at the absurdity of it all. It was a mix of disgust and dismay, that we sat mind-numbed totally digging what amounted to a blatant batch of bullshit. Psychics, we were led to believe were right, whilst most of the functional world seemed to rely on science. I remember sitting on most insomniac nights, watching the pot smuggling Dionne extol the accuracy and value of her psychic friends, in-between painful half-hour plugs for face cream endorsed by Judith Light or George Foreman’s grilling machine. I remember wondering if psychics did know what was going to happen. People always seem to take solace in those that profess to know more than they. We’ve believed that way back to our respective salad days when our Mummy’s or Daddy’s told us tales of the tooth fairy or Santa Claus.

For the last few months, I’ve been trying to organise my notes and papers. Ever since I got a filing cabinet, I’ve been hoping to get everything in there in some semblance of organisation. Amongst the things I’ve been culling -- for future reference no doubt -- are newspaper articles. When writing a Political Science paper, an essay by Roger Gibbins or an editorial by Barbara Amiel could come in use. At least I hope. One of the articles I found in a file is one taken from around the time of the last federal election in 2000. Seems some scribbler at the National Post elicited the forecasting of one JoJo Savard. Remember her? Mme. Savard was the flamboyant and irritating Canadian psychic who filled the airwaves of this country with claims of foretelling the future. She was blond, busty and back-achingly annoying. She had that Francophone accent that was grating, which sort of defined her subsequent infamy.

Mme. Savard -- a self-anointed “fairy of the stars” -- predicted the third Liberal majority of Jean Chrétien. For that, nearly two years after the fact, she should be commended for prescient predicting, or utter stupidity. Everyone knew Chrétien was going to win, it was kismet the moment Stockwell Day appeared on a Ski-Doo.

Another JoJo prophecy that went fulfilled was Joe Clark winning the Calgary Centre seat, accomplishing what many political watchers thought was damn near impossible. For Alexa McDonough, she didn’t predicted that come June of 2002 she’d announce her resignation. Savard did say however she’d “need all the help” she could get; suggesting she ditch her pumpkin coloured outfits for a purple number since it’d be her election day colour. McDonough, if you’ll recall, managed to hang on to official party status, but did so losing a few seats.

Savard’s predictions on the Bloc Quebecois were guarded. I guess I call them guarded because she said leader Gilles Duceppe would “hastily depart” from political life in 2003. She did say the Bloc’s presence would slip in Quebec. Like the Chrétien prediction, that was obvious to even the minor political watcher at the time. The Bloc Quebecois was punished for the Parti Quebecois’ lackluster performance provincially.

Of her more laughable predictions dealt with one Stockwell Day, then leader of the Canadian Alliance. She said he’d have another chance to become prime minister. I’m still laughing. Frankly, Stockwell Day has burned his bridges towards 24 Sussex. His own party has seen to that, dispatching Stephen Harper two sword lengths apart from Jean Chrétien. But Savard did say that Day would have a long political career. That’s possible, because I don’t see it as impossible that he sit in the House as an exemplary senior MP for his party.

On the general Canadian scene Savard predicted that the years 2002, 2003 and 2004 are to “be marvellous.” What more could she say, really? Would, if it appeared in the cards or tea leaves that Canada would disintegrate physically, she tell us? I think not. Psychics are really there to sell those willing to listen hope. In a year that’s seen a number of things nationally and internationally stirring, hope is pretty good compared to pain.

I still don’t believe in psychics. I do enjoy listening to those psychic readings that Ben Mulroney likes to facilitate on the chatroom television program. There are those who fully believe, and in a way I do worry for them. Those that live their lives to the forecast of a psychic are often seen missing out of life, either from worry or avoidance knowing what the eccentric said. Then again the same could be said of religion. That’s another topic, and I think I ought to wait for a sign before delving into that.

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