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Overheard . . . - THE COMMENTARY

By Joseph Planta

VANCOUVER - Running this website does not afford me much time to write in this column. A lot of the free time I have is spent doing administrative things, and so there's little time for me wax satirical, pursue punditry, or expound my own humble opinions. I still go to Drudge multiple times a day, and Bourque; I listen to Don Imus every morning and I read the papers. In place of a political column or a book review, allow me to keep you up-to-date on some interesting items that have crossed my radar the last little while. Overheard gossip, if you will. There's nothing wrong with gossip, considering that the first gossips were Matthew, Mark, and Luke, among others, who wrote gospels for God himself.

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The gossip maven at the New York Post and a hundred other newspapers across the United States, Liz Smith turned 81 last Monday, Groundhog Day. I had sent Miz Liz a note wishing her a happy birthday and she replied with a note saying my note made her year. She also wished "the other Groundhog," my Mum, a happy birthday. Hers, like Liz, is on the 2nd of February.

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Speaking of birthdays, my Mum was taken to lunch. It was Cin Cin this year. I'd never been to the place, though you hear about it all the time. Gossipmongers in this town, like Darren Parkman, Joy Metcalfe and Lynne McNamara, rave about the place as a joint where those Hollywood celebs frequent and frequently tie on the old feedbag. I did not see any celebrities while I was there, but in the past stars like Robin Williams, Halle Berry and Goldie Hawn have orbited Cin Cin's dining room. Tamara Taggart, the comely weather-beater on the local news is said to regularly lunch there. (And if you read Angele Yanor's sex column, you'll know that vivacious Tamara is also a karaoke aficionado.)

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I was watching Joan Rivers' red carpet show at the Grammy's this past Sunday, and couldn't help but notice the National Post's Shinan Govani in the background. As Rivers was making fun of Janet Jackson's boob - fallout from last week's Super Bowl fall out - there was Govani chatting away on his cell phone, looking as if he was trying to get into the E! shot. Govani, who was on the red carpet readying himself to co-host Global's own red carpet shindig for Canadian viewers, e-mails The Commentary denying it. "It was I . . . not 'trying to get into the shot' however," writes the Post writer in an e-mail an hour and a half after the Grammy telecast wrapped. Shouldn't he have been hanging out at post-Grammy parties instead of writing me? Just asking.

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Marty Beckerman, the humour columnist, whose new book Generation S.L.U.T. (MTV Books, 2004) is set to be released later this month, was interviewed by Now That's Entertainment's Michael Kwan. The interview is interesting, and worth reading at Kwan's site: http://www.geocities.com/now_thats_entertainment . By the way, Michael, who is also The Commentary's Senior Contributing Writer, will have a review on these pages in the next week or so.

Beckerman, by the way, has posted both Michael Kwan's interview and review on his own site (http://www.martybeckerman.com) . Beckerman shows off Kwan's review as "extremely positive" as well as "non-Christian." He also describes The Commentary as a "Canadian lit zine." The Commentary has been described as many things - that's a first.

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My fellow Tupper Secondary (and Dickens Elementary) alum Jackie Pierre sends some photos of her daughter Simone. The baby looks delightful, and Jackie should be proud. My best to both Mum and daughter, who is four months old already! Mozeltov.

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Speaking of former Tupperites, Margaret Tse, who is listed on this site's masthead as a contributor, threw a hell of a bash before Christmas. It was well attended by a plethora of former Tupperites from Margaret's class of 2000. Spotted at the bash were Erin Ritchie, Julio Leon, and a number of folks affiliated with this website, including Michael Kwan, Babak Khorram, Richie Leung, Vishal Dhir, and May Chan, who arrived late. Edward Lau, a class of 2000 Tupperite, was fresh from his sentence in Edmonton, glad to be back. Soon after hosting the party, Miss Margaret was off to Montana for camp, where it is reported she met a special friend. Special friend lives in Chicago. She will visit him in March, and while in the Windy City will visit Oprah. Yes, the Oprah. No word yet if she'll actually be a guest on the show.

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Speaking of love lives, another Commentary contributor, Brian Nguyen is reported to be happily involved with someone. Someone is a transvestite named Gary (not that there's anything wrong with that). Messages for Brian to either confirm or refute the report were not responded to in time for deadline.

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Speaking of former Tupperites, there was an interesting development in the long-running saga involving Michael Kwan and Eugene Lee. Kwan disagreed with two pieces written by Lee which appeared on these pages last fall, and proceeded to compose a column - which appears on his site, Now That's Entertainment. Some have said Michael's piece amounted to an attack on Eugene, while some have said it wasn't, including Michael himself. Lee claims to have not read the piece, and is amazed at what could possibly have precipitated the Kwan column. When asked, he says he has nothing against Michael. He does wonder however, "Why does he always pick on me?"

Frankly, I've known the both of them for a number of years, and since both are friends of mine, I've refrained from making any comment, other than that both made some valid points in their respective pieces. All I know is that they will never be friends, so I see no reason why this hand wringing in print should continue. The war of words that wasn't, is probably an apt postscript, as Eugene refuses to dignify Michael's piece further.

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And a belated shout out to Maggie Yau, a regular Commentary reader. She celebrated her birthday this past Sunday, madly writing papers. Chin up, doll.

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